Love On Top: Do Jouer’s Lip Toppers Make Us Go Gaga – Or Say “Hell Naw!”

Published on February 6, 2018 by   ·   No Comments

Take a moment to get over the cheesy title (it was obviously just a cheap excuse to include a Queen Bey fave, “Love On Top,” in this post!) and let’s talk about this phenomenon of “lip toppers.”  Unlike eyeshadow toppers, which is a rant for another day but seems to just be code for “shitty eyeshadow,” lip toppers are a legit thing and they can add some interesting shine and dimension to your lip looks.  I’ve written a few times about various collections of the Diamond Crushers lip toppers from Lime Crime and they, along with the Everlasting Glimmer Veils from Kat Von D, are still some of my favorites.  When a lip topper is good, it can make for a really special moment in your face beat.

That’s the end of the positive part of this review.

Seriously, I hate to be a bitch, especially the first time I’m reviewing a brand, but this was just not good.

I decided to pick up three products, ordering through the Beautylish website: the Long Wear Lip Creme in Rose Gold, and two shades of the Long Weat Lip Topper, Rose Gold and the Jeffree Star collab shade Sweet Tooth.

Jouer 06The Lip Cremes and the Lip Toppers are formulated to go together; I don’t hate that, but out the gate it tells me that these are probably going to be fussy if you try to pair them with other things, and that was definitely a problem as we went along.  I had seen someone do a lip look with the two Rose Gold products and it photographed really well, so I was hoping it would be just as good in person.  It wasn’t.  Here’s the swatches:

Jouer 05

It’s harder to tell from the hand swatches (I’ll include lip swatches below), but this is an extremely dry formula; I almost wonder if the Lip Toppers were developed to make this formula wearable at all!  It dried down so tight on my lips that it emphasized every nook and cranny and line in my lips, and I felt like my lips were going to crack.  It was super uncomfortable.  I usually will give a liquid lipstick a little bit of wear time while I’m working on the post so that I get a sense of how it feels, but this one got painted on, photographed, and then wiped the fuck off!

The Lip Toppers did make it a little better, in terms of the feels, but I just wasn’t that impressed with how the final lip look turned out.  Granted, we’ve made it very clear that I ride the struggle bus when it comes to photographing, so my limited skills certainly played a part in how these images look, but I also feel like even with less than ideal lighting I should be able to get some sense of how the products are going to look.  This is what I got:

Jouer 08

I don’t even really see a difference between the one on the bottom left with the Rose Gold topper and the one on the bottom right with Sweet Tooth.  The color sheers out so much that you get a little bit of glitter and a little bit of “wet look” reflection, but that’s about it.  It certainly doesn’t do anything to transform the overall look.  For comparison, here are the photos from the Beautylish site showing what the colors are supposed to look like in professional lighting:

I mean, look at those photos – they look gorgeous!  That’s what I wanted to happen all over my lips.

I knew that I hated the Lip Creme, but I wanted to see if I could resuscitate the Lip Toppers and use them over a different formula of liquid lipstick.  In the pics below, I used Carnival liquid lipstick from Color Kill (which I recently reviewed HERE!) with Sweet Tooth:

Jouer 07If you’re not detecting much glitter in this pic, your eyes are not deceiving you: the Lip Topper reactivated the liquid lipstick and it all became a muddy mess.  Obviously I didn’t try this with every single lipstick formula in my collection, so there may be some it works with, but this one was a disaster.  My Sweet Tooth wand was quickly coated in the base lipstick and the final coverage was patchy and inconsistent.  I’m giving the Lip Creme to a friend, and I’m doubting whether the Lip Toppers are even worth holding onto if they are going to muck things up like this.  If you love these formulas then at least you’ll be able to wear them together, but beware if you’re going to be mixing them with other products in your kit.  They definitely do not play well with others!

Jouer 03I really, really wanted these to work.  Lately I’ve been in this blah place where I just buy the same brands over and over and I’m pretty sick of it.  A new brand with gorgeous, sparkling lip toppers to jazz up my liquid lipsticks?  Yes, please!  But no matter how much I wanted it, it just wasn’t meant to be.  I guess I probably should have figured out that there was something up when Jeffree Star was super excited to announce his collab…and hasn’t really mentioned Jouer on his channel since!

Say it with me y’all:  “Hell Naw!”

Now Go Forth & Get Painted!

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